So I have been in the Land Downunder now for just over 4 months which in one way has gone fast and another way feels like a frickin' lifetime!! I thought the Land of Sand was going to be easy to leave as I've always felt at home whenever I've been in Australia and it's always been my dream to live here. Following dreams can be overrated! Ha no, i still believe in my dreams and I'm sure just teething problems but really, this 4 months of my life has tested me to the max more than any tough day out at an Ironman could ever do.
Imagine all the things that could upset the equilibrium of your day to day life all happening at once (having no job, no car, having no money, having no prospects of getting any money soon, moving house never mind moving country, having no one really to lean on/offload to, feeling a little on the edge of things, left out..the day to day structure of training and aiming for the next race suddenly removed) and that's how I've felt. And it's not just the 'Big' things like moving country, being homeless for a while, leaving a work lifestyle and friends that you loved - it's what all that represents: stability, security, status, sense of self-worth, sense of Self!, financial freedom.... It's so so weird to have built up a 'following' in UAE where everyone knew who I was and what I did (for a living and as an athlete) and then to come somewhere where I have no history...sounds liberating in a way, but sometimes it can destroy your self-confidence to a point where you think, can I ever get to that point again?? I miss my classes so much. I miss the sparkly trees at JBH. I miss my friends. I miss being so busy doing the things i love. I miss people knowing me for the person i really am rather than feeling like the Loser Chick who catches herself talking to herself in public (HOW embarrassing) and staring at people on real bikes while i'm pedalling my 80$ one and wondering where Mr Felt is and if he too is dreaming of our glory days. Lol.
And yes it was my decision to do this so I am not Whingeing :-) just been to the lowest point so the only way is to get straight back up :-) And believe me, I am so not going through this re-locating thing again so I am going to make it work. Am not Irongirl for nothing ;-)
it all starts here!
About Me
- irongirl downunder
- This Blog is intended as a bit of fun, a kind of diary that fellow triathletes who have found themselves absorbed by the sport might identify with. It's not meant to be a blah all about me me me (although i guess it is in a way ;-D) I just want to write about what is turning into an exciting year for me as an athlete after spending the last four years solely focussing on work (although I LOVE my work! now I get to look after myself a bit too :-) ) I guess I have an unusual life for an Age Grouper in that my work is also largely related to triathlon in coaching other triathletes and organising events. I also teach fitness classes which I am so passionate about, and all this largely in the fabulous surroundings of beach locations in Dubai. I love my life I am very lucky I know....