Friday, August 27, 2010
another week in the life of IG downunder....
If someone had told me that almost 5 months down the line I still would not have a real income and wouldn't be working in fitness or teaching my classes I swear I wouldn't have come here!! But it's amazing what you get on with when survival is the key and you can't be fussy. Years ago I used to teach English as a foreign/second language and ended up ditching it as a 'career' for several reasons - (1) cos I never intended it as a career, just as a way to travel, (2) cos I'd reached a ceiling, I'd got as far as I could without going into management and that didn't interest me and (3) I was totally miserable with the whole EFL work ethos. So I got out and pursued my passion. Went from being employed and all the security that went with it to working for myself. So I guess in a way, where I am now I've been before... Anyhow my main reason for talking about this is that the only work I've got so far is English teaching so that past career has been a total lifesaver! and the strange thing is I'm enjoying the contact with the students (Japanese, Brazilian, Peruvian, Hungarian...) because we're all in the same situation - all trying to make it in the Land Downunder but all needing to be on a student visa to stay here for now, all missing our jobs/vocations, all facing the same hurdles/problems, all skint and struggling financially, all having given up a heck of a lot to pursue our dreams of an Aussie lifestyle...subsequently I'm apparently really popular as a teacher - my colleagues/employers must think that's 'cos i'm a dedicated and talented teacher LOL!!
Meanwhile I'm desperately trying to relaunch my fitness career - the one I'm really passionate about here...I think this will take up another post another day!! But in the meantime today I'm really excited 'cos I've finally found a race I can aim for, until now I've felt like an unhappy helium balloon, not really attached to anything just blown about aimlessly...for years now I've always had a race lined up and without that I feel like something's missing in my life!! It needs to be something I don't need to spend money going to (for obvious reasons) and a single discipline is preferable at this point of low income and head full of other stuff... Anyhow today I found a 50k race right here on the Gold Coast in December! I called up the organiser to check it's on and it is, so that 's it - nearby, achievable in terms of training - come back training mojo, your time of apathy and slotheness is over - Slothegirl 0 Irongirl 1 :-) :-)
Meanwhile I'm desperately trying to relaunch my fitness career - the one I'm really passionate about here...I think this will take up another post another day!! But in the meantime today I'm really excited 'cos I've finally found a race I can aim for, until now I've felt like an unhappy helium balloon, not really attached to anything just blown about aimlessly...for years now I've always had a race lined up and without that I feel like something's missing in my life!! It needs to be something I don't need to spend money going to (for obvious reasons) and a single discipline is preferable at this point of low income and head full of other stuff... Anyhow today I found a 50k race right here on the Gold Coast in December! I called up the organiser to check it's on and it is, so that 's it - nearby, achievable in terms of training - come back training mojo, your time of apathy and slotheness is over - Slothegirl 0 Irongirl 1 :-) :-)
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Am not Irongirl for nothing :-S !
So I have been in the Land Downunder now for just over 4 months which in one way has gone fast and another way feels like a frickin' lifetime!! I thought the Land of Sand was going to be easy to leave as I've always felt at home whenever I've been in Australia and it's always been my dream to live here. Following dreams can be overrated! Ha no, i still believe in my dreams and I'm sure just teething problems but really, this 4 months of my life has tested me to the max more than any tough day out at an Ironman could ever do.
Imagine all the things that could upset the equilibrium of your day to day life all happening at once (having no job, no car, having no money, having no prospects of getting any money soon, moving house never mind moving country, having no one really to lean on/offload to, feeling a little on the edge of things, left out..the day to day structure of training and aiming for the next race suddenly removed) and that's how I've felt. And it's not just the 'Big' things like moving country, being homeless for a while, leaving a work lifestyle and friends that you loved - it's what all that represents: stability, security, status, sense of self-worth, sense of Self!, financial freedom.... It's so so weird to have built up a 'following' in UAE where everyone knew who I was and what I did (for a living and as an athlete) and then to come somewhere where I have no history...sounds liberating in a way, but sometimes it can destroy your self-confidence to a point where you think, can I ever get to that point again?? I miss my classes so much. I miss the sparkly trees at JBH. I miss my friends. I miss being so busy doing the things i love. I miss people knowing me for the person i really am rather than feeling like the Loser Chick who catches herself talking to herself in public (HOW embarrassing) and staring at people on real bikes while i'm pedalling my 80$ one and wondering where Mr Felt is and if he too is dreaming of our glory days. Lol.
And yes it was my decision to do this so I am not Whingeing :-) just been to the lowest point so the only way is to get straight back up :-) And believe me, I am so not going through this re-locating thing again so I am going to make it work. Am not Irongirl for nothing ;-)
Imagine all the things that could upset the equilibrium of your day to day life all happening at once (having no job, no car, having no money, having no prospects of getting any money soon, moving house never mind moving country, having no one really to lean on/offload to, feeling a little on the edge of things, left out..the day to day structure of training and aiming for the next race suddenly removed) and that's how I've felt. And it's not just the 'Big' things like moving country, being homeless for a while, leaving a work lifestyle and friends that you loved - it's what all that represents: stability, security, status, sense of self-worth, sense of Self!, financial freedom.... It's so so weird to have built up a 'following' in UAE where everyone knew who I was and what I did (for a living and as an athlete) and then to come somewhere where I have no history...sounds liberating in a way, but sometimes it can destroy your self-confidence to a point where you think, can I ever get to that point again?? I miss my classes so much. I miss the sparkly trees at JBH. I miss my friends. I miss being so busy doing the things i love. I miss people knowing me for the person i really am rather than feeling like the Loser Chick who catches herself talking to herself in public (HOW embarrassing) and staring at people on real bikes while i'm pedalling my 80$ one and wondering where Mr Felt is and if he too is dreaming of our glory days. Lol.
And yes it was my decision to do this so I am not Whingeing :-) just been to the lowest point so the only way is to get straight back up :-) And believe me, I am so not going through this re-locating thing again so I am going to make it work. Am not Irongirl for nothing ;-)
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
first post in a year!!
gosh where does the time go?? well i sort of lost interest in a lot of things after a day that altered the course of my life but now i'm in a new country starting up a new life and am ready to get back on track - hopefully with racing and with my blog!! sooo much to say. Four months tomorrow i left Dubai for Australia and in a way it's gone so fast and in another it feels like a lifetime!! I feel i'm in a kind of limbo right now - i have cut the mooring ropes from my long term home in the UAE but don't quite feel like i belong here yet...it's a weird feeling but not as horribly unsettled as i felt in my first few months here... More musings to follow....
Monday, August 17, 2009
the mysteriously changing run to the finish!
The run route had changed mysteriously and wasn’t what it had been on the map (supposed to be out towards the town centre with a bit of an out and back in the first half and a twirly loopy bit towards the end). So combined with this surprise change and the fact it was also quite hilly and that i was hobbling, i had no idea how to visualise it ( it became an out and back and back again after about 7k then a mile to the end). What was really doing my head in (and everyone else’s as i found out later) was that there were no distance markers! So there was no way of knowing where you were, what you’d done and how far still to go! Everyone was asking everyone else on the way – madness! Asking the marshalls was fruitless also as they all kept giving different answers which was so demoralising (especially when you’re having to walk it!). There was a strange bit round a park which you did at the end of each out and back and many people went wrong as they weren’t sure where to go and how many times! The rest of the run was mainly along a busy main road – not very exciting – and a bit along a canal and through some suburbs.
As it was quite lonely on the second lap (i still couldn’t run but was out-striding the other stragglers) sometimes I felt a bit daft walking along a main road wearing a race number. Most of the stragglers were smiling and supporting each other as we passed but there was one nasty guy who said to me ‘good luck hon’ sarcastically and laughed to his mate! That just made me even more determined to finish and anyway, he was walking!! The people of Bolton were very nice and supportive but at one point i got mobbed by a crowd of young hooligans who were surrounding me and trying to trip me up (quite easy really, i was having problems with kerbs never mind small bullies) riling me about walking when i should be running and one trying to leap on me presumably to grab my sunnies! As it got dark and i was still out there with only the shadows and the owls for company i was waiting for an official to jump out with glowsticks but none came. In fact scarier than the teenage bullies was having to walk along the canal path in the dark. There was an aid station just before the start of it and i asked them if it was safe. They seemed more interested in force feeding me power gels so off i went. Maaan it was scary! Pitch black and all i could think of was axe murderers leaping out of the shadows! I couldn’t believe they didn’t have someone at least going up and down on a bike to check the stragglers hadn’t fallen in the canal/been attacked by werewolves etc etc. At the end of the canal bit i couldn’t even find the pathway that took you away from it back to the road it was so dark! The park later on was the same – you couldn’t actually see the cones and tape until you fell over them!
Finally, after 8 last long miles of random bunches of marshalls/happy bystanders/cheerleaders telling me variously i was anywhere between 8 miles and 3 and a half miles to the end (but not in order – i got something like 8, 7, 5, 4and half, 3, back to 5 then four and half then only 2 then back to 3 – aaargh! how to mess with an irongirl’s already frazzled mind!!) i got back to a cone junction in the park i nearly fell over and could dimly pick out the vague shape of a person. He turned out to be one of the race crew/new guardian angel and escorted me through the last of the pitch black bits agreeing with me how crap the race was! Then he grabbed my hand and made me run towards to the finish line (pain blocked out then – i could NOT walk up the finish chute!!) and there i was, FINALLY – a long long day out and an embarrassing finish time of 16.30 something 33? 34? Don’t know just too crap! But hey i got round, there were several points where i thought i might not make the cut off and how awful that would have been!! The worst thing is i actually trained for this one! Anyway i am still 6 X Irongirl and that’s what matters ;-)
phew, got there!
As it was quite lonely on the second lap (i still couldn’t run but was out-striding the other stragglers) sometimes I felt a bit daft walking along a main road wearing a race number. Most of the stragglers were smiling and supporting each other as we passed but there was one nasty guy who said to me ‘good luck hon’ sarcastically and laughed to his mate! That just made me even more determined to finish and anyway, he was walking!! The people of Bolton were very nice and supportive but at one point i got mobbed by a crowd of young hooligans who were surrounding me and trying to trip me up (quite easy really, i was having problems with kerbs never mind small bullies) riling me about walking when i should be running and one trying to leap on me presumably to grab my sunnies! As it got dark and i was still out there with only the shadows and the owls for company i was waiting for an official to jump out with glowsticks but none came. In fact scarier than the teenage bullies was having to walk along the canal path in the dark. There was an aid station just before the start of it and i asked them if it was safe. They seemed more interested in force feeding me power gels so off i went. Maaan it was scary! Pitch black and all i could think of was axe murderers leaping out of the shadows! I couldn’t believe they didn’t have someone at least going up and down on a bike to check the stragglers hadn’t fallen in the canal/been attacked by werewolves etc etc. At the end of the canal bit i couldn’t even find the pathway that took you away from it back to the road it was so dark! The park later on was the same – you couldn’t actually see the cones and tape until you fell over them!
Finally, after 8 last long miles of random bunches of marshalls/happy bystanders/cheerleaders telling me variously i was anywhere between 8 miles and 3 and a half miles to the end (but not in order – i got something like 8, 7, 5, 4and half, 3, back to 5 then four and half then only 2 then back to 3 – aaargh! how to mess with an irongirl’s already frazzled mind!!) i got back to a cone junction in the park i nearly fell over and could dimly pick out the vague shape of a person. He turned out to be one of the race crew/new guardian angel and escorted me through the last of the pitch black bits agreeing with me how crap the race was! Then he grabbed my hand and made me run towards to the finish line (pain blocked out then – i could NOT walk up the finish chute!!) and there i was, FINALLY – a long long day out and an embarrassing finish time of 16.30 something 33? 34? Don’t know just too crap! But hey i got round, there were several points where i thought i might not make the cut off and how awful that would have been!! The worst thing is i actually trained for this one! Anyway i am still 6 X Irongirl and that’s what matters ;-)
phew, got there!
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